October 14, 2014, Maddox
Episode 22 Transcript
courtesy of Laurie Foster
| California Drought Dickbags ||2792|
| Hippies ||2592|
Here's the 1984 Big Brother water tattling app
that you can use to usher in our impending dystopian future. Not that it matters, because 80% of our water use goes directly towards agriculture and industry, not to mention 15% of our water goes directly towards alfalfa crops.
Next time you want to eat alfalfa, eat a dick instead.
And what Tuesday would be complete without a gallon or two of sweet, sweet governmental hypocrisy
? Apparently council members are too important to abide by their own credo. And even though many municipalities exceeded water usage targets
, it hasn't stopped preachy hipsters from their "well, actually..." sermons. They won't be happy until everyone stops showering.
And speaking of not showering, here's how to be a hippie
according to WikiHow. Because apparently being a judgmental, deadbeat hypocrite takes effort, and a uniform.
Photo credit: Darlin Barry
, Kaz / Pixbay.