October 14, 2014, Maddox

Episode 22 Transcript courtesy of Laurie Foster

California Drought Dickbags	2792
Hippies	2592

Here's the 1984 Big Brother water tattling app that you can use to usher in our impending dystopian future. Not that it matters, because 80% of our water use goes directly towards agriculture and industry, not to mention 15% of our water goes directly towards alfalfa crops. Next time you want to eat alfalfa, eat a dick instead.

And what Tuesday would be complete without a gallon or two of sweet, sweet governmental hypocrisy? Apparently council members are too important to abide by their own credo. And even though many municipalities exceeded water usage targets, it hasn't stopped preachy hipsters from their "well, actually..." sermons. They won't be happy until everyone stops showering.

And speaking of not showering, here's how to be a hippie according to WikiHow. Because apparently being a judgmental, deadbeat hypocrite takes effort, and a uniform.

Photo credit: Darlin Barry, Kaz / Pixbay.

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