May 2, 2016, Dick

Art	200
Meditation	41
Shoes	318
Welding	273

The bet of the century is finally settled between Maddox and Commander Crunch, how far away from Earth is Voyager? Maddox brings us the answer straight out of NASA's mouth. According to my Twitter poll, about half of you will be surprised!

I bring in Meditation. If you thought meditation was a bunch of hippy-dippy, phony-baloney, cockamommy nonsense, you're among friends. Maddox and I both call bullshit on this solution, however, I present many a stats suggesting meditation has massive health benefits for your lying machine, or "brain" as some people call it. To test this, the three of us agree to a radical experiment by meditating three times a week for the next month. Will we remember? Who will be the smuggest about their results? Tune in next month and bring your $1.33.

Maddox brings in welding. Mig, tig, you name it, as long as it's one of those two, we're talking about it on this episode. Have you ever wondered how your grandmother's glass candy bowls get those stupid fruit shapes on the side? According to Maddox, the answer is welding. For this and presumably many other reasons, welding deserves your respect and your votes.

I bring in a solution that needs no welding at all: Shoes. Chances are, your shoes have done more for you than any one or anything in your life. Walking, driving, having sex, everything in life is easier with shoes. Without shoes, 100% of everyone's day would be spent worrying about stepping in dog shit and heroin needles. In fact, 1,200 people are killed every year just for their shoes! Vote them up.

Finally, Maddox brings in Art and this turns into an argument about communicating with aliens. If you are an alien, please call in and settle the debate. Until next month.

Incredible thumbnail courtesy of Ali Hassanein Instagram - https://instagram.com/alihassanein

Sources: Daily Mail - Meditation makes your brain 7 years younger. PsyBlog - A bunch of boring studies about meditation.

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